- mom: what time did you go to bed last night?
- me: that information is confidential
even olaf has more of an eyebrow game than me and he’s a snowman
When you’re with two other friends and they’re talking to each other and you’re just there like
Remember when every girl wanted this phone
yoo if you had this phone in 2005 you were the coolest bitch on the block
I didn’t know this was a thing. my dad had this phone.
then your dad was the coolest bitch on the block no exceptions
Comment on the size of a man’s penis and it’s a low blow and a stab at his masculinity. Comment on the size of a woman’s anything and it’s a social norm.
I wonder if famous people get bored of their songs like you get bored of your selfies
I just fucking want to be hot and walk naked around my house and look at the mirror and say godamn u look good today instead of crying